She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
