so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Randomize
