ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
He felt like a one man threesome
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize
