i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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