So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
I'm too high and old for this...
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Randomize