Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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