Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Stacy lit a fart and burn half of the couch down before we can put the Flames out. Bring your truck.
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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