I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
