I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
