Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
