Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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