I wish I could still say I don't know that you taste like bad ice cream.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I think I just cured my dogs munchies
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
