i always forget guys have bellybuttons
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I'm trying. I feel like we're trying to have sex with fruitcake. dry and boring.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
Randomize
