i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
You shouted "FUCK SHANIA TWAIN" and then downed an Aquafina bottle of white wine none of us knew how to react
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Just got home, my brothers stoned and he got a high score on COD.. He just asked me if I wanted to have a celebrational yogurt with him. Wtf?
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
