mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
She tied me up with her honor cords...
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
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