some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
either way he was missing a nipple.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
Your shit was massive.
I'm not 100% sure how to respond to that.
If you were in a "who has the massivest shit contest", you'd win by a landslide.
Randomize