We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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