Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
