it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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