Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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