Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
