JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
