somehow on my way home with matt, I ended up straddling steve on the sidewalk and polling the people walking by on whether or not we should have sex.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
