Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I hate babysitting girls whose boobs are bigger than mine.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
Randomize
