That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
