Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
My mom has tinder, she is 45 and has her age setting at 18-29. And she still gets more matches than me
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize