Why are handjobs necessary in class?
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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