he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
23 Bosses Confess The Craziest Thing They’ve Seen An Employee Do
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
19 People Confess What It’s Like To Have Sex With Someone That Is Transitioning
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
Randomize
