She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
