yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
dude, boobs are like the porridge in goldylocks
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
Randomize
