I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
