you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
