Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
