just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
