That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I think I need to start sobriety testing my Tinder dates.
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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