Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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