Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
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