you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
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