My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
My mom just came upstairs handed me an Adderall and asked if I could help her wash the ceilings
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
