ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
