Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
