Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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