Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
there's still three solo cups of your puke in my basement. so that needs to be solved at some point.
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
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