i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
