make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
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