I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
