i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
