Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Tried killing a moth in our bathroom. Water everywhere. Don't worry about it.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Randomize
