We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
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