I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
im six kinds of drunk right now
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Randomize