White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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