He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Did I show you my penis last night?
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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